Archive for the E-honor Category

CapVerfex and Zylien Luzifer Give CNRs, Deadspace Loot, and 500M to Paul Clavet

Posted in Combat, E-honor, Ninja Salvaging on June 22, 2011 by paul

So, it had been too long. RL concerns have been keeping me from spending much time plying my ninja trade. Today, however, I was home with a sinus infection, high on medication, and bored, so I figured I’d see if my inactivity had lowered my profile enough that carebears would shoot at me. I wasn’t disappointed!

I launched probes and my first hit was a pair of CNRs in a Worlds Collide mission. Now, I’ve been watching as other ninjas did horrible things to mission runners with “salvaging” combat frigates, so a few weeks ago I traded JerkTengu in for some assault frigs, faction frigs, and a Hurricane. Also making a return was the Sacrilege, albeit now T2-fit instead of faction pimped. I grabbed my bait Worm and warped into the mission. As soon as I grabbed some worthless piece of loot, both CNRs locked onto my frigate and fired. I pointed the older of the two players, CapVerfex, and started killing drones, but two opponents’ worth of drones was just too much, and I warped out of the mission in low armor.

As I left, I watched my speed-fit orca alt arrive at the front room. I had it begin approaching the gate to the Guristas room, where my victims were still pewing rats. I warped my Worm back into the mission, caught up with the Orca, and swapped to the Sacrilege. Despite having a Noctis alt in the entrance, neither pilot noticed me until I landed on top of them.

I opened a convo with CapVerfex:

Paul Clavet > 500M or your ship dies
Paul Clavet > You will not get another chance for this
CapVerfex > hmm you sure that i dont pop if i give you the money??^^
Paul Clavet > I do this for a living
Paul Clavet > if I dishonor ransoms, I don’t get more
CapVerfex > kk

CapVerfex > stop shoot
Paul Clavet > 30 seconds to pay
CapVerfex > i send -_-
Paul Clavet > 15 seconds

*CapVerfex pays 500,000,000.00 ISK*

CapVerfex > payed
Paul Clavet > now 500 more
CapVerfex > im blank -_-
Paul Clavet > eject from the other CNR
CapVerfex > damn it
Paul Clavet > last chance
CapVerfex > i dont have the money -_-
CapVerfex > stop it and i can ask the other pilot
Paul Clavet > what other ships do you have?
CapVerfex > lol.. im misson runner and this is my only one …
CapVerfex > -_-

I tried for a second ransom the way that many of my younger Ninja brethren do, but found it to be less satisfying than the SUDDENLY BETRAYAL that I had made popular.

As I burned through CapVerfex’s structure, I was amazed to find that Zylien Luzifer wasn’t warping away. There’s no reason he should have let this happen:


Sigh. Zylien went down even easier.

CapVerfex’s CNR – Including a Caldari Navy Ballistic Control Unit, and a Gist X-Type XL Booster.

Zylien Luzifer’s CNR

I got video of this kill, but I was running four clients, so the framerate was terrible. Also, with some new changes and bugs being introduced since the last time I did this sort of thing, my rustiness from not having done it so long, and the effects of my illness and medication on me, my performance was definitely sub-par. I will try to get good video next time!

Chase08888 Hands Paul Clavet 600M ISK

Posted in Capers, Duffers, E-honor on March 24, 2011 by paul

Remember back in October of 2009 when Michella infiltrated Transfixion?

A young man named Chase08888/Chase88888 was one of the primary victims of that infiltration and the subsequent extortion. It appears that shortly after that caper, he dropped corp and left on bad terms with the leadership. Even though he KNEW that it was my habit to take victims’ money and walk away, and had contacted me several times in the months following, asking what it would take to hire me to infiltrate them again. Of course I had no intention of doing so, but I offered to hit them for an Orca, which at that time was valued at approximately 600M ISK. He said that he didn’t have the money, and I forgot all about him.

This evening, about a year and a half after I robbed Chase, lied to him, and robbed him again, he opened a convo out of the blue.

Paul Clavet > yes?
Chase08888 > u still in the inflitraing corps biz?
Paul Clavet > Perhaps.
chase88888 > =p
Paul Clavet > If you’ve got a point, please present it
chase88888 > sorry
chase88888 > uhh kindof of hard to get to the point if i dont know if you capable or doign it
Paul Clavet > I am capable of anything. What did you need?
chase88888 > are you still able to inflitrate corps or not
Paul Clavet > Yes, I have three alts ready
chase88888 > ok
chase88888 > what are the prices?
Paul Clavet > Looking to hire me finally?
Paul Clavet > Tell me what you’re wanting done
chase88888 > transfixion hit again
chase88888 > kill them or rob them idc
Paul Clavet > let’s see… they have 63 members now
Paul Clavet > still live in a wormhole?
chase88888 > idk
chase88888 > i have been out of thier corp for over a year
chase88888 > prolly
Paul Clavet > Are you wanting them stolen from, or ganked, or what?
chase88888 > stolen
Paul Clavet > How much have you got?
Paul Clavet > I will need at least enough to plex one of my ready alts for two months
chase88888 > liquid about 700m. 🙁 just bought an archon
Paul Clavet > Basically the way it works is that you pay for my account for two months. When I steal, you get 50% of whatever I steal, and I pay you back the two plex
chase88888 > ok
chase88888 > what do plexs go for these days? (been in 0.0)
Paul Clavet > When I stole from them before I got 8 billion ISK
chase88888 > nice
chase88888 > they run an allaince now… so idk if that makes a differance
Paul Clavet > Plex are about 350 mil each in this area… I would accept a little less because I can get them cheaper
Paul Clavet > so 600 mil up front
Paul Clavet > of course you get the 600 mil back plus half what I steal
chase88888 > rgr
Paul Clavet > I could start when my vacation starts actually, in 4 days
chase88888 > kk
Paul Clavet > So if you’ll pay me today I’ll activate the alt and start getting him in
chase88888 > will do
Paul Clavet > just send it to this character
chase88888 > i have to sell something on an alt they will
Paul Clavet > ok
Paul Clavet > just convo me when you send it
Paul Clavet > kinda excited about getting them again
Paul Clavet > Troy was a dick
chase88888 > lol
chase88888 > if u can
Paul Clavet > oh I will 🙂
chase88888 > get my sparky110 corpse
Paul Clavet > I still have insider information on them, will make it really easy to get in
chase88888 > ill give u 50m for it
Paul Clavet > OK, if I get it it’s yours
chase88888 > 🙂
chase88888 > main reason i want towhack them.. guy was a faggot
chase88888 > i ahve 500m right now if u want me to send it.. then i will send u the rest?
Paul Clavet > yeah, be sure to remind me when you send the final 100M
chase88888 > kk

He sends the money.

chase88888 > sent
chase88888 > get it?
Paul Clavet > OK, make sure you convo me when you send the final 100M
Paul Clavet > yeah, I got the 500M
chase88888 > kk
Paul Clavet > OK, I gotta go. I’ll start the preliminary information gathering
Paul Clavet > now here’s another option
Paul Clavet > if you can pay me an additional plex, I can get a second character in
Paul Clavet > that way when I hit them and get kicked out, I can hit them again shortly after
Paul Clavet > I’ve done it a couple times now, it’s completely devastating
chase88888 > i would but once i send the other 100m i will only have 18m left
Paul Clavet > it won’t pay much on the second hit because I will have taken most of their stuff
chase88888 > fucking HUNS keeping me from jewing
Paul Clavet > ok well, we’ll work with what we have
chase88888 > sorry 🙁
chase88888 > iw ould love to do it
chase88888 > i would love to kill that allaince also
Paul Clavet > Maybe you have some assets you could contract instead? Maybe an orca or something?
Paul Clavet > You’re about to be fucking rich when I rip them off, so it won’t matter 🙂
chase88888 > nah got nothign
Paul Clavet > You could always buy a GTC
chase88888 > i could lol
chase88888 > tbh all i have it is my archon and harby
Paul Clavet > well hmmm
Paul Clavet > This would take about two weeks
Paul Clavet > so you send me the archon as security deposit
Paul Clavet > I get the second character in
chase88888 > nah
Paul Clavet > I can send you back the 200M, so you’ll have 300M walking around money
chase88888 > i need the archon
Paul Clavet > you’d get it back as soon as I stole
chase88888 > nah i need it for ops and moving shit
chase88888 > the arhcon is staying with mee.. sorry
Paul Clavet > fair enough, you might change your mind when you think about the entire alliance imploding 🙂
Paul Clavet > but of course I understand
chase88888 > ya but i need this for allaince and corp ops and shit… and moving stuff around
Paul Clavet > OK…. well for now we’ll do just the one character. If you decide you want a one-two punch you can always GTC.
Paul Clavet > Of course, if you wanted to REALLY splatter them I could hire mercs to work with me
Paul Clavet > start an attack on their POS as soon as I hit them the first time
chase88888 > lol
Paul Clavet > then the second character betrays them right as the POS attack starts
Paul Clavet > instant failure 🙂
chase88888 > 🙂
Paul Clavet > but I understand if you don’t want to do that… it’d be worth it but it’s an awful lot of money
chase88888 > ya it would be
chase88888 > ill get the other 100m withen the next hour
Paul Clavet > OK, make sure you get in touch with me when you do so I don’t miss it
chase88888 > kk
Paul Clavet > as a summary, to hit them twice would be another 300M, and to hire mercs to completely wipe their POS from space is an additional 750M.
Paul Clavet > Just in case you decide to GTC
Paul Clavet > last alliance we did that to disbanded
chase88888 > may i ask what mercs?
Paul Clavet > It’s a group that doesn’t do public contracts
chase88888 > like who?
chase88888 > ninjas
chase88888 > ?
Paul Clavet > a lot of them were involved in Underworld Excavators
chase88888 > ahh ok
Paul Clavet > there are a few Noir. pilots that work with them
Paul Clavet > but they have dreads and supercarriers
chase88888 > oh ok cool
chase88888 > ill ltink about it
Paul Clavet > it’s pretty fucking terrifying
chase88888 > meh we lost a titan saturday
chase88888 > (my corp)
Paul Clavet > They do need a couple weeks notice though, so if you decide you want this to coincide with my second hit you’d need to pay today or tomorrow
chase88888 > ok
chase88888 > i dont think that second hit will happen ttbh
Paul Clavet > like I said, you could give the archon, that would get you the whole package (if fitted) and you could replace the archon in two weeks
Paul Clavet > but it’s your call, that’s a lot to trust me with
chase88888 > nah keeping the archon
Paul Clavet > but as you know, I’m very good at this
chase88888 > ya but im keeping th archon.
Paul Clavet > then I guess it would have to be GTC 🙂
chase88888 > ya lol
chase88888 > idk il think about it
Paul Clavet > OK, you know where to find me bud
Paul Clavet > let me know when you finalize the transaction, and I’ll start the ball rolling
Paul Clavet > you only have about a day to decide if you wanna go for the full implosion option
Paul Clavet > o/
chase88888 > rgr

A little while later, he sent the additional 100M and stated that this was all he wanted to commit to the endeavor.

At that point I revealed it was a scam and attempted to extort an additional 600M from him. He must have FINALLY learned his lesson, because he allowed himself to be talked out of it by his corpmates. At the time of the original heist he was 15 years old, which means that he would be approaching adulthood now. Chase, I hope that you take this lesson to heart before you leave the safety of home and step into the real world!

Graaatch: Working an Hour for Paul Clavet

Posted in Combat, Delicious Tears, Duffers, E-honor, Ninja Salvaging on November 18, 2010 by paul

So I had a couple of hours, and felt like ganking a carebear. I logged onto Eve and launched probes, finding a Rokh and two Golems within a minute. Knowing that a marauder would be clearing as it went, I held the Rokh until the end. The first Golem was finishing up and warped away soon after I arrived. The second Golem, flown by Graaatch, shot at me after I looted a couple of small wrecks. I evacuated my Vigil (actually it was Khalia’s Vigil, but that’s a long story) and retrieved the Sacrilege.

As I arrived, he warped out.

Oh well, I guess I’ll go on to… wait a minute! Did he just warp to a planet?

I warped to Ruvas I at 0km. There he was.

I was actually a little worried at first. He was tanking me really well, and it was taking both my armor repairers to barely keep up with his damage.

As his tank started to break, I opened a convo with him. I will include the highlights, and give you a pastebin to the entire log at the end of the post.

Paul Clavet > How much is your ship worth to you?
Graaatch > for a rat…nothin…i has more
Paul Clavet > OK then
Paul Clavet > now that you’re out of cap
Graaatch > are you planning on lettin me go for less than 50 mill
Paul Clavet > lessee… how much is a golem worth?
Paul Clavet > I’ll take 450 mil
Graaatch > is not about how much its worth its about how much i have
Paul Clavet > I guess you don’t have rich friends then?
Graaatch > i have no friends thats why im in a free corp
Paul Clavet > If you have an unfitted golem, contract it to me and I’ll let this one go
Paul Clavet > or make me an offer
Graaatch > like i said…if you want 50mill or less i can do that but i dont have that kind of money and i dont have another golem…i have more ships like a rohk or orca but nothin like a golem
Paul Clavet > I’d take an orca
Graaatch > well…is fitted and carrying my hulk atm so im not going to give those up
Paul Clavet > your time is about to run out
Paul Clavet > you’d better make me an offer soon

I’ve gotten ransoms before, but I’d never had someone take me up on my suggestion to contract over assets in lieu of cash.

Paul Clavet > Contract the Orca with Hulk
Paul Clavet > it’s worth less than your Golem
Paul Clavet > or you lose your Golem and fittings
Paul Clavet > one minute left
Graaatch > im lookin for it….
Paul Clavet > Found it?
Graaatch > yea but the hulks not in it
Paul Clavet > the orca and 50M then
Paul Clavet > quickly
Graaatch > ok h/o
Graaatch > is up

My contract icon blinks.


Now then, to crack open this pinata and see what falls out…

Paul Clavet > SUDDENLY
Paul Clavet > BETRAYAL

Killmail. That’s a solid billion-ISK ship. Shame the Pith B-Type XL Booster didn’t drop.

Paul Clavet > Now then
Paul Clavet > what have we learned?
Graaatch > that some people are just douche bags and cant be trusted….that those people play big billy badass in the internet because irl they get picked on by everyone cause they cant do anything worthy of anyone
Paul Clavet > You are right, I do nothing cool IRL
Paul Clavet > Truly thou hast struck a mortal blow
Graaatch > figured
Paul Clavet > but thanks for the orca and faction mods
Graaatch > yea…get bent pizza face…try not to get raped by daddy tonight
Paul Clavet > Your tears are delicious. My cup overfloweth!

Now, I’ve gotten a few kills since my hiatus, but no quality tears. These are textbook grief-tears!

Graaatch > am i pist off yea….cause i lost my golem…a lil…mostly cause you cant trust people these days
Paul Clavet > Yeah, I mean if you can’t trust the CEO of “Honorless Internet Jerks” then who CAN you trust?
Graaatch > idc who you are
Paul Clavet > Obviously not, because you trusted me.

Why do people get the impression that they can trust even their corpmates in Eve, much less some random guy that out-witted them?

Graaatch > me…i know enough….i can go ahead right now and buy a couple plexs and replace the golem and mods
Paul Clavet > I encourage you to do exactly that
Paul Clavet > you’ve fuelled my playtime for another six weeks
Graaatch > grats question is…can you afford to play without being a leach…..are you a leach on society as well and in EVE
Graaatch > i would imagine you are
Paul Clavet > Yep, I’m a total non-contributor both in eve and IRL. I’ve never done anything worthwhile in either realm
Graaatch > me….i dont have the time to play games like this all day…i work for a living
Paul Clavet > I would work for a living too if I was that terrible at games
Graaatch > go figure

I resisted the urge to tell him that at that point I had been logged in for 45 minutes out of the past week.

Graaatch > its not cause im terrible at games….its cause i wanna keep the mustang gt and chevy z71 in my driveway full with gas and the roof over my head
Paul Clavet > Go look under the passenger floorboard… you might find an orca to replace the one you gave away!

Ah, the old “my fail here doesn’t matter because IRL I make lots of money!” routine.

Paul Clavet > Never forget that you fired first
Paul Clavet > You were obviously the aggressor
Graaatch > now…if i was TRYING to pvp…i would have been setup w/ a warp stab and a large neut

Wait, what?

Paul Clavet > So maybe you can figure out how much work-time it’ll take you to recover the bil or so for the golem… then you can remember while you’re at work that you’re essentially working for me
Paul Clavet > So stop slacking!
Graaatch > hmm thats good but it will be 1 hr of work for 3x plexs
Paul Clavet > Yep!
Paul Clavet > An hour of work for Paul Clavet
Graaatch > i can deal w/ that
Paul Clavet > Well good, perhaps we can do this again sometime!

I can only hope that at work tomorrow, he remembers what happened here today, and thinks of me. And then gets the hell back to work. The slacker. Honestly, I don’t know what I keep him around for.

Graaatch > like i said…i treat folks the way i want to be treated…i know full well the pvp of this game…i spent some time in 0.0….does everyone breat ransoms…no….we never did when i was runnin 0.0 space
Graaatch > break*
Paul Clavet > wait… you’re claiming to have knowledge of pvp?
Paul Clavet > Is that why your idea of a PVP fit involves warp stabs?
Paul Clavet > Is that why you warp to zero on a planet then sit still?
Graaatch > do i pvp in high sec….no…when i do…its usually 1 person and a warp stab will get you out….if im runnin in a pack i dont….was i expecting you to follow….no
Paul Clavet > So I guess you DID learn something useful today!
Graaatch > but being in a bs….its a slow boat
Paul Clavet > I will send you a bill tomorrow.
Graaatch > ill be sure to ignore it and wait for your in game supena
Paul Clavet > You misspelled subpoena
Paul Clavet > but what do I know, right?
Graaatch > rofl so your a grammer nazi too
Graaatch > clasic
Paul Clavet > classic*

There was a little more chest-beating by Graaatch in response to my poking, and if you want to read the complete log, you can do so over at pastebin.

It was an hour well-spent in Eve. The Orca was transported by an alt to Jita, where it sold for 350 million ISK. My total take was approximately 475 million.

Snipehamster downs a Raven, reaps tears

Posted in Combat, Delicious Tears, E-honor, Ninja Salvaging on November 11, 2010 by khalia

I’ve been slowly getting back into Eve. So today I’m logged on and Snipehamster in The Ninja Alliance is having some trouble finding a Raven wreck on d-scan in Balginia. I offer to warp down with my pimp’d covops and scan for him, and he agrees.

I find the raven wreck by finding the nearby drones, and it turns out the Raven pilot, Rediska2, is back in his mission with another Raven. Snipehamster and I warp in and loot his Raven wreck. He then fires on Snipehamster’s Vigil.

[ 2010.11.11 20:23:56 ] Rediska2 > get away from here
[ 2010.11.11 20:26:52 ] Johanes Miller > mmm loots
[ 2010.11.11 20:26:54 ] Johanes Miller > thanks dude
[ 2010.11.11 20:27:10 ] Rediska2 > next time i’ll hit you
[ 2010.11.11 20:27:23 ] Johanes Miller > sure…

So I warp back to keep an eye on Rediska2 while Snipehamster goes for a PVP cane. He’s back in a flash, points Rediska2, and his Raven falls like a rock – the Raven starting with 70% armor damage!

Snipehunter goes for the ransom, but Rediska2 says nothing, and pop goes the Raven – to the rats still shooting him.

[ 2010.11.11 20:36:31 ] Snipehamster > 40 mil or your raven dies.
[ 2010.11.11 20:36:39 ] Snipehamster > 30 seconds.
[ 2010.11.11 20:37:13 ] Rediska2 > mother fucker
[ 2010.11.11 20:37:19 ] Johanes Miller > hahahah
[ 2010.11.11 20:38:06 ] Drak Kron > lol
[ 2010.11.11 20:38:11 ] Drak Kron > well played
[ 2010.11.11 20:39:05 ] Johanes Miller > we let the rats kill him… again

Rediska2 ragelogs, but a local gets all hot and bothered about this, to our general amusement.

[ 2010.11.11 20:39:56 ] el toppolino > i take it you killed a guy in mission and got aggro ?
[ 2010.11.11 20:40:35 ] Johanes Miller > his raven was hilarity fit
[ 2010.11.11 20:40:50 ] el toppolino > he is young
[ 2010.11.11 20:40:54 ] Johanes Miller > Neutron blaster on a raven, lol
[ 2010.11.11 20:40:56 ] el toppolino > and had no intention to pvp
[ 2010.11.11 20:41:08 ] el toppolino > try real pvp
[ 2010.11.11 20:41:15 ] Johanes Miller > he shot, that’s usually intent to pvp =)
[ 2010.11.11 20:41:17 ] el toppolino > killing noobs is so 90s
[ 2010.11.11 20:41:24 ] el toppolino > and needs no skills
[ 2010.11.11 20:41:50 ] Johanes Miller > but tears are juicy and sweet
[ 2010.11.11 20:42:00 ] el toppolino > i prefer thrill and good fights
[ 2010.11.11 20:42:04 ] el toppolino > then i am proud
[ 2010.11.11 20:42:07 ] Drak Kron > thats what your mom said
[ 2010.11.11 20:42:37 ] Snipehamster > Thrill? You mean like dodging battleship fire in a tankless frigate?
[ 2010.11.11 20:42:41 ] Snipehamster > :V
[ 2010.11.11 20:42:43 ] el toppolino > those kids today
[ 2010.11.11 20:43:03 ] el toppolino > they fear real pvp in lowsec wars or 0.0
[ 2010.11.11 20:43:05 ] Johanes Miller > oh man, he ragelogged
[ 2010.11.11 20:43:10 ] el toppolino > and are happy to kill noobs
[ 2010.11.11 20:43:47 ] Johanes Miller > they make nice crunchy sounds and kick and scream
[ 2010.11.11 20:44:06 ] Snipehamster > He fired first (at a vigil with less than 900 ehp) – I don’t think either of us was looking for a fair fight
[ 2010.11.11 20:44:19 ] el toppolino > we all know why he fired
[ 2010.11.11 20:44:35 ] Snipehamster > Because I looted the wreck of the last raven he lost. :V
[ 2010.11.11 20:44:36 ] el toppolino > cheap tricks to get aggro
[ 2010.11.11 20:44:43 ] Johanes Miller > exactly
[ 2010.11.11 20:44:55 ] Snipehamster > looting a wreck is a cheap trick? since when?
[ 2010.11.11 20:44:57 ] Johanes Miller > we scanned down his drones to get the old wreck, we didn’t think he’d be there
[ 2010.11.11 20:45:25 ] el toppolino > i couldnt be proud to kill a noob who isnt able to spell raven really
[ 2010.11.11 20:45:45 ] Johanes Miller > proud? I’m in it for the lolz
[ 2010.11.11 20:45:59 ] el toppolino > you sound proud dont you
[ 2010.11.11 20:46:09 ] Snipehamster > I’m less than 2 months old, and this was my first BS kill. Pride is pretty accurate tbh
[ 2010.11.11 20:46:14 ] el toppolino > else you wouldnt tell your story here
[ 2010.11.11 20:46:26 ] Johanes Miller > proud is what I do in real life, the game is fun and lolz
[ 2010.11.11 20:46:42 ] el toppolino > its the same
[ 2010.11.11 20:46:53 ] Johanes Miller > the game is real life?
[ 2010.11.11 20:46:56 ] el toppolino > try stealing from your corp
[ 2010.11.11 20:47:04 ] el toppolino > it will hunt you your whole eve life
[ 2010.11.11 20:47:36 ] Johanes Miller > wonders if he should mention that he is actually the alt of a well known corp infiltrator
[ 2010.11.11 20:47:51 ] Snipehamster > wonders how you steal from an NPC corp
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:26 ] el toppolino > see it has nothing to do with fun its your personality
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:31 ] Johanes Miller > yeah
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:35 ] Johanes Miller > I’m a jerk
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:37 ] Johanes Miller > and proud of it
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:38 ] Johanes Miller > 😀
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:45 ] el toppolino > now you got it
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:48 ] el toppolino > no friends
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:50 ] el toppolino > fat
[ 2010.11.11 20:48:53 ] Johanes Miller > HAHA
[ 2010.11.11 20:49:09 ] Johanes Miller > tell me more about how miserable my life is
[ 2010.11.11 20:49:21 ] Snipehamster > Aww yeah, playground insults. Someone’s running out of ideas :3
[ 2010.11.11 20:49:49 ] el toppolino > i dont see any insults…
[ 2010.11.11 20:49:57 ] Nete > hahah
[ 2010.11.11 20:50:04 ] Snipehamster > >.>
[ 2010.11.11 20:50:10 ] el toppolino > try to be like me
[ 2010.11.11 20:50:23 ] el toppolino > work your way up in an alliance
[ 2010.11.11 20:50:26 ] el toppolino > fc
[ 2010.11.11 20:50:34 ] el toppolino > get a name in eve
[ 2010.11.11 20:50:47 ] el toppolino > you wont get that for killing noobs
[ 2010.11.11 20:50:47 ] Johanes Miller > I’ve never heard of you
[ 2010.11.11 20:51:05 ] Johanes Miller > Snipe, you heard of this guy?
[ 2010.11.11 20:51:06 ] Nete > i’ve never heard of EVE… what’s that?
[ 2010.11.11 20:51:31 ] Snipehamster > nope. His shiny blue allcaps bio makes him look pretty hard though. I wouldn’t mess with this guy tbh
[ 2010.11.11 20:52:22 ] Johanes Miller > anyone with ‘el’ in the name must be cool, amirite?
[ 2010.11.11 20:52:30 ] Drak Kron > ^^

Blog Banter #20 – Griefing in EVE

Posted in Come On!, E-honor, Ninja Salvaging on August 25, 2010 by paul

With the recent completion of the 3rd installment of the Hulkageddon last month, @CyberinEVE, author of Hands Off, My Loots!, asks: “Griefing is a very big part of EVE. Ninja Salvaging, Suicide Ganking, Trolling, and Scamming are all a very large part of the game. What do you think about all these things? You can talk about one, or all…but just let us know your overall opinion on Griefing, and any recommendations you may have to change it if you think it’s needed.”

Now, normally I don’t do the Blog Banter competitions, because, well, I’m lazy. However, seeing as I’m one of the “public faces” of the hi-sec Griefer scene, I’ve gotten about a dozen requests for my thoughts on this.

Most of the responses I’ve read to this Blog Banter have actually ignored the question entirely. Instead of posting their opinions on Ninja Salvaging, Suicide Ganking, Trolling, and Scamming, they’ve posted pages of text about how none of these activities are “Griefing”.

So I’m going to do something similar and ignore the actual question. Instead, let’s talk about words and what they mean. I’m thinking of a particular word: Piracy.

When an Eve player self-identifies as a Pirate, you know EXACTLY what he’s talking about: A player who hangs out in lowsec, looking for “good fights” against other “Pirates”. Sure, once in a while a foolish carebear stumbles into their domain, but for the most part Pirates are merely engaging with consensual PvP with other players of the same class. I’m not knocking it because I know it can be fun, but piracy it ain’t.

Being a pirate means preying on the unsuspecting, the weak, or the foolhardy. It seems to me that Ninja Salvaging, Suicide Ganking, and Scamming would fall neatly into the definition, while e-honor “good fight!” piracy would not.

So we call ourselves Griefers because our actions cause grief, not just as a byproduct but often as a primary objective. The truth of the matter is that a better term for us would be pirates, but that term was hijacked by low-security PvPers who had no real reason to use it. Folks are trying to deny us the title “Griefer” because our actions are within the intended mechanics of the game. This is missing the point entirely.

I understand the confusion, since in most MMOs, ruining someone else’s game is out of the question due both to rules and the game mechanics. In Eve, the universe is such a cold and unforgiving place that such behavior is not only allowed, but is required by a certain segment of the population in order for successes in the game by the law-abiding to have any meaning.

We’re Griefers. If you come up with a better title for those who prey on the weak in Eve, I’d love to hear it.

Rothrizar learns Scamming 101, provides delicious tears

Posted in Capers, Delicious Tears, E-honor, Uncategorized on July 24, 2010 by khalia

I’ve been away from the Jerk lifestyle for a while, trying some of the other things in EVE. One of the Ninja Alliance members, Meccros, had been making ISK from loan scams – which I had not tried – and I got the chance to try it out today. Hillarity resulted.

I was using one of my alts in Jita for some market manipulation when I saw someone in local requesting a loan:

Rothrizar > can someone lend me ISK for a ship?

I quickly convo’d him to see if I could pull one over on him.

Secret Alt > hi there
Secret Alt > you were looking for a loan?
Rothrizar > hello
Rothrizar > yes, im looking to get enough ISK to purchase the Raven and fit it
Secret Alt > And how are you paying back?
Rothrizar > I guess its not really a loan then lol
Secret Alt > I can loan you isk, if you’re willing to pay it back with a small amount extra, if you tell me how you’re making money
Secret Alt > are you missioning?
Rothrizar > thats what i was doing
Secret Alt > Hm, I see
Rothrizar > i was piloting a drakerunning lvl 3s
Secret Alt > do you have anything to offer as colateral?
Secret Alt > ah, ok
Secret Alt > you could offer the drake as collateral
Rothrizar > the only problem with that is, it doesnt exist anymore
Secret Alt > Hm.
Rothrizar > I have a primae over in eitu
Rothrizar > bout all i have left hehe
Secret Alt > Oh, that would work
Secret Alt > How much ISK are you looking for?
Rothrizar > 40 mil max
Secret Alt > Ok, I can do that.
Secret Alt > I’ll need to fly over to Eitu to set up the contract there
Secret Alt > standard loan contract
Secret Alt > Just don’t screw me over, ok? 😉
Rothrizar > I wont screw you over

With trust established, I head over to Eitu to take his Primae. Click below to read on =)

This is LONG, but totally worth the read.

Read more »

Paul Clavet’s Comeback: Qhuashimides’ Golem and 600M Ransom

Posted in Combat, E-honor, Ninja Salvaging on July 22, 2010 by paul

It’s been far too long. For a while there I had quit salvaging and was thinking about a long break from Eve altogether.

Talking to Khalia the other day, I decided to just grit my teeth and salvage until I got a kill, to see if the taste of CareBlood would return me to my Jerk ways.

It did. Meet Qhuashimides. He was running Worlds Collide in Ruvas in his faction-fit Golem when I popped in to say hello. He fired at me.

It’s been too long. I was about to cloud up and rain all over this guy.

He stayed put while I went to grab JerkTengu and return. He never checked his directional scanner as I burned 30km to the gate and warped into the Guristas room where he awaited his doom.

When he saw me, however, he apparently mashed Control-Q in an effort to get away.

This didn’t work. I had him locked and pointed before his very expensive CareBoat could CareAlign and CareGTFO. He soon logged back in and started firing back, but JerkTengu easily tanked his oversized Torpedoes. With a neut sucking on his capacitor and max-SP HAMs pouring into his shields, his tank broke before long.

Since he was now unmistakably online, I tried for another conversation.

Paul Clavet > o/
Paul Clavet > So how much is the ship worth to you?
Qhuashimides > i am listening
Qhuashimides > how much do you want?
Paul Clavet > Let’s say… 600M to let the ship go
Paul Clavet > I figure it’s worth that
Qhuashimides > ok
Paul Clavet > 30S to pay

He was trying to stall for time.

Paul Clavet > I’m not going to wait for you to call in help
Qhuashimides > no
Qhuashimides > i am not
Paul Clavet > then pay up, you’re running out of time
Qhuashimides > you wqant how much
Paul Clavet > 600 million

A long pause. I know what he’s thinking.

Qhuashimides > and how i know you will no t pop me?
Paul Clavet > 20 seconds
Paul Clavet > this is how I make my living
Paul Clavet > if I dishonor a ransom, nobody else will pay

Carebears always ask me this, I always lie through my teeth, and they always believe me. Thank you, e-honour pirates, for perpetuating the myth that people who caught you once can be trusted afterward.

Qhuashimides > wait
Qhuashimides > i wont call anyone
Paul Clavet > I’m giving you another 10 seconds
Paul Clavet > then you die
Qhuashimides > ok?
Paul Clavet > Paying or not?
Qhuashimides > i payed you mate

No, he didn’t. Or did he? I check my wallet and see a 600,000 payment. Nice try. I click my HAM launcher group once, then again, sending a single volley to knock out a quarter of his structure. That seems to get his attention.

Qhuashimides > sorry
Qhuashimides > my mistake
Paul Clavet > 600k?
Paul Clavet > try again
Paul Clavet > last chance dude

Cha-ching. 600M appears in my wallet. I begin firing again.

Paul Clavet > SUDDENLY
Paul Clavet > BETRAYAL
Qhuashimides > ok
Qhuashimides > nice
Paul Clavet > yup
Paul Clavet > So then
Paul Clavet > what have we learned?

He is already offline again when his ship pops.

And here’s the killmail. Faction loot, but only about 100 million of it actually drops.

Edited to add: Oh yeah, I also got his Ship’s Crew.

Saelii Loses Rokh, 100M ISK

Posted in Combat, E-honor, Ninja Salvaging on May 20, 2010 by paul

In Ichoriya, I find a Rokh running faction missions. After taking a dozen 1M ISK tags, Saelii locks and fires. I warp off to the Orca, grab JerkTengu, and return. I open a convo with Saelii just as my warp disruptor engages.

Paul Clavet > 100M or your ship dies
Saelii > death is fine
Paul Clavet > fair enough

Confident, I see. As her shields vanish and her armor starts falling apart, I make the offer again.

Paul Clavet > It’s not too late, you could still save your ship…
Saelii > k
Saelii > you could still kill me if i give it to you
Paul Clavet > I could, but then I wouldn’t get any more business
Paul Clavet > Ransoms are more profitable

Allow me to paraphrase:

Victim: Why should I trust you?
Ganker: Because you should trust me.
Victim: OK, now I trust you.

Saelii pays. The result is inevitable.

Saelii > let me go
Paul Clavet > No?


Saelii > you got the money why you did not let me go?
Paul Clavet > Because I’m the CEO of Honorless Internet Jerks?
Saelii > fair

They never learn.

Tebos Has Trust Issues, Pays with Cash and Ferox

Posted in Capers, Delicious Tears, E-honor on April 24, 2010 by paul

So I’m Jerking it up in Ichoriya when I see this in local:

Tebos > anyone want to help me out witha ninja?

Interesting. I should at least see what’s up with him. Maybe it’s someone I know, or maybe I can turn it into a griefing opportunity. I convo him with my Orca alt.

Semi-Secret Orca Alt > h8 ninjas
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > how can i help
Tebos > have one scramed and he scamed me
Tebos > cant hit his ass
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > lol
Tebos > he is in assult ship
Tebos > took out all my drones
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > is he killing you?
Tebos > he stoped firing
Tebos > im back to 10% dmg
Tebos > think he is waiting for corps mates to finish me off
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > what’s his name?
Tebos > Kaript344
Tebos > same one some folks were talking about

So I convo Kaript344 on my main to see if I can help him with the gank:

Paul Clavet > hey
Kaript344 > hey
Paul Clavet > my alt is in convo with your target
Paul Clavet > he thinks I’m helping him
Paul Clavet > but I want to help you with the gank
Paul Clavet > how can I help?
Kaript344 > no, thx)
Kaript344 > that’s fun
Kaript344 > 😀

So it looks like Kaript doesn’t need my help. Oh well. I’m not going to take a chance on his target getting away if I can help it, and maybe I can pull off something even bigger…

A plan falls together that involves a trick I often use to get JerkTengu away from traps, much to my amusement and to the rage of my targets.

Tebos > any chance u can give me a hand?
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > how can I help? I don’t have aggro on him
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > what kinda ship are you in?
Tebos > ferox
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > OK, I have an orca
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > here’s the plan
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > I will warp to you, you swap the ferox for a shuttle
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > then warp away
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > we meet at station and you get your ferox back
Tebos > really that will work?
Tebos > im game
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > yeah, I do it in lowsec all the time
Tebos > to be done with this dip shit
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > lemme get the orca
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > fleet invite?

He sends me a fleet invite. His corpmate Eulysees Chelt is in the chat as well. I warp my Orca to the station and take all the loot and ships out of the holds so that he can’t steal anything from me. I undock the Orca and start the slooooow align to his mission.

Semi-Secret Orca Alt > OK dude here’s the deal
Tebos > ok
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > when I land, right click me and access the ship maint array
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > there’s a shuttle in there
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > right click it and board it
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > I have to be 2500M away, so I may have to burn to you
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > do you understand?
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > you have to warp away IMMEDIATELY or he will scram the shuttle
Eulysees Chelt > and t’s ship ?
Tebos > how long after u warp in?
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > as soon as I’m in range, warping now
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > fly toward me
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > OK, go ahead and right click me
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > open ship maint array
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > you won’t be able to board the shuttle until I’m 2k away
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > ok now

The shuttle vanishes, and in its place a Ferox battlecruiser appears. It will turn out to be T1 rigged and T2 fitted. Rule #2 of Eve Griefing: Secure your gains, then try for a little more.

Semi-Secret Orca Alt > warp out
Tebos > k
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > we saved your ship o/
Eulysees Chelt > Semi-Secret Orca Alt……..what happens to the ship thats left behind ?
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > don’t suppose I get a reward? 😀
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > it didn’t get left behind, I’ve got it in my orca
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > will trade it to you at the station
Eulysees Chelt > ah ok
Eulysees Chelt > nice moves man
Tebos > wow that was cool…and yes u get reward man =)
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > 😀
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > how much do I get? 🙂
Eulysees Chelt > what you want ?
Tebos > how much u want bro?…u name the price
Eulysees Chelt > realistically
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > figure a ferox is worth 30m? Maybe 10m
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > brb
Tebos > i live with that…
Tebos > im at caldari
Tebos > ok man money transfered

Of course, he doesn’t ask for his ship back before he sends the reward. Rule #3 of Eve Griefing: Make sure your victim is fully aware of his loss.

Semi-Secret Orca Alt > thanks man
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > btw
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > thanks for the ferox too
Tebos > bah….
Tebos > awsome
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > heh heh
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > A mite bit too trusting, ain’t ya?
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > I’m the alt of Paul Clavet
Tebos > yes i am…but its my nature
Tebos > prob not a good idea in eve
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > right

I’ve got his money and his ship. Let’s implement Rule #2 again and try for more. The plan is to sell him what he thinks is his own ship back at what seems a reasonable price. It’s actually going to be an unfitted ship with the same name.

Semi-Secret Orca Alt > I’m open to offers if you wanna buy this thing back
Tebos > well lesson learned i quess
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > I can’t fly a ferox anyway
Tebos > any chance u can just give it back? =
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > not really
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > but I’ll sell it to you for market price
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > plus a little for fittings… say 22 million?
Tebos > thats an expensive ferox
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > you must have fittings on it
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > that’s where you save the money
Tebos > hehe ur a good sales man
Semi-Secret Orca Alt > we have a deal?
Tebos > but i think i will cut my loses =|

Bah. It looks like he’s wised up. Most pinatas can only be struck so many times before the candy stops falling out.

His friend Eulysees tries to make a parting threat on his way out of the chat.

Eulysees Chelt > cmon man…you helped he payed what gives ?
Eulysees Chelt > you know you wanna watch your back my friend….one man team an all

A lot of really magical griefing moments can be had simply by keeping one’s eyes open for opportunities. If you can keep an open mind and think outside the box, you can leverage your capabilities against the unique situation of your victim to pull off effective but extremely situational capers.

As for Tebos, he learned a valuable and ultimately inexpensive lesson about trust in Eve. There is no such thing as a sure thing when it comes to dealing with people. The closest to total trustworthiness would be someone you know outside of the game who you can get your hands on… but even this is pushing it, since it’s not RL illegal to be a jerk to your friend in a video game. Think hard about this next time you’re taking a stranger’s offer to get you out of a bind, or the next time the new guy in your corp volunteers to do some grunt work that requires hangar access. Tebos and I chatted for a while after these events and he seems like a sincerely nice guy. I hope I’ve changed his mind a little bit about Eve and his playstyle options. I love tears, but I love it even more when I convert a carebear into a griefer. Maybe there’s a future in it for Tebos?

The delusions of the e-honor crowd

Posted in Delicious Tears, E-honor, Ninja Salvaging on February 12, 2010 by khalia

I found CadetBoot in his Hyperion and started eating up his tasty loot. A few minutes later, an Evemail arrives. What follows is the entire back and forth, edited for clarity.

I find this a perfect example of the reason I ninja salvage and other “dishonorable” activities: To disabuse those of the notion that Eve is a game that has anything to do with “honor” or “respect”. People who can’t tell a game from the real world need a reality check.


YOu ruin the game for honest people


What is this ‘honest’ thing you speak of?


If you can’t figure that out then you prove my point



You need to train ‘Sarcasm and Insult Detection’ to level I.


Then let’s try this. Stealing is not honest.


Yes, and? I believe under the terms of the game you were free to open fire on me without CONCORD getting involved.

If CCP didn’t want stealing to happen, they’d have made it so you can’t open someone else’s can. Get used to it 😉


The difference between you and me is that you look to steal from others. I would never even consider it. Your actions gain you no respect. And in my world, respect matters. Just because the game allows it doesn’t mean you have to succumb to the temptation.

Consider this. If there were only your kind in the game, there would be no game.


Why should I care? It’s a game. I can cheat, lie, scam, betray, kill and pillage. Apparently you are unable to distinguish between the real world and the online world?

If there were only men on the planet, there’d be no people. But just like your example, it’s a useless point. There *always* will be clueless people like you who think “honor” and “respect” matter in a game about internet spaceships.

Go back to WoW or Hello Kitty Online.


I didn’t expect my comments to change your mind about your gameplay. And it didn’t. So be it. But hopefully one day you’ll realize that honor and respect always matter, regardless of the situation.

The end.

Yes folks, always remember: Computer games are the same as the real world.